R.W.Shannon: Sex and the Single Vamp
- By R.W. Shannon
- Published March 7, 2011
R.W. Shannon
I currently have three paranormal, interracial romances published with Cobblestone Press with a lot more to come in the next year
My website is www.rwshannonbooks.net . My blog is rwshannonbooks.blogspot.com.
My hobbies include shopping, belly dancing, yoga.
Weakness : Cheesecake, tattoos, motorcycles. Guys that have all three...
I currently live on the East Coast.
I hate being single. Yeah. I said it. I know that I’m supposed to be happy about it. Face it with grace and humility, but I don’t want to. I will kick, scream and yell because it sucks. Here I am, writing these erotic stories that make your toes curl and I can’t even cool the fires that arise from writing them. (Well, I could, but I’m tired of doing that by myself, too).
Friends try to help with advice. “Focus on you,” they say. I do and I have. There are only so many movies, fancy solo dinners and concerts that one can partake alone before you start to go crazy. Plus, I’ve been “doing me” for twenty years now. Isn’t it beyond time that the universe brings me whoever this guy is supposed to be?
The other bad advice is “don’t look.” I haven’t. I have focused on my career. I brought my dream car. My house. My dog. I’ve travelled. Lived in different parts of the country. And….nothing. Plus, how is he supposed to find me if I don’t look?
“Well, what about online dating?” *Sigh* If I have to look at one more topless, in the bathroom mirror picture or the one in front of the muscle car that’s not his, I will scream. Then, there are the guys who are on the site, but don’t want to date or who view going out with the same person more than once as being in a “relationship” and, of course, they’re not ready for a relationship.
Granted, the single life does have its perks. I can do what I want, when I want. I can hog the remote. I can quit my job without having to talk to someone about it first. Still, it would be nice to have someone to curl up against at night besides my laptop.
My last date was back in October. Since then, the well has been dry. All I want is a man who is caring, independent. Intelligent. Doesn’t live with his mama or baby mama. Has a job and is ready to be in a relationship. So, what’s it going to take?
Is it me? I ask myself this repeatedly. I’m attractive. I go to yoga. I take a belly dancing class on the weekends. I can cook. I’m intelligent. Positive. And knows the difference between a touchdown and a touchback. Maybe I’m too independent. If I go and lay down on the train track, will he come then? Probably not but setting up a booth in the navel yard is looking pretty tempting.
Lately, the song, Ready for Love by India. Aire has greeted me when I wake up in the morning. If I am ready, what’s his hold up? I’ve meet plenty of great guys but there has been no spark. I have been in love. Have had a couple of almost relationships, where, on paper, the guy was everything I wanted but it just wasn’t right.
I’ve also been hurt, abused, raped, and abandoned. But I’ve never been loved. Have never received flowers just because. Yet, I still fantasize that I’ll turn the corner one day and he’ll be there. Until then, I’ll just have to keep writing about him, but I’m starting to get a cramp in my hand.
R.W. Shannon is the author of several reads on IRE, including Business Before Pleasure and The Education of Sophie. Her upcoming release schedule includes : Nocturne – Beautiful Trouble Publishing, Chasing Dawn –Phaze Books, and Silver Moon – Cobblestone Press. Her other titles can be found on Cobblestone Press. Check out R.W. Shannon's Website and Blog
Friends try to help with advice. “Focus on you,” they say. I do and I have. There are only so many movies, fancy solo dinners and concerts that one can partake alone before you start to go crazy. Plus, I’ve been “doing me” for twenty years now. Isn’t it beyond time that the universe brings me whoever this guy is supposed to be?
The other bad advice is “don’t look.” I haven’t. I have focused on my career. I brought my dream car. My house. My dog. I’ve travelled. Lived in different parts of the country. And….nothing. Plus, how is he supposed to find me if I don’t look?
“Well, what about online dating?” *Sigh* If I have to look at one more topless, in the bathroom mirror picture or the one in front of the muscle car that’s not his, I will scream. Then, there are the guys who are on the site, but don’t want to date or who view going out with the same person more than once as being in a “relationship” and, of course, they’re not ready for a relationship.
Granted, the single life does have its perks. I can do what I want, when I want. I can hog the remote. I can quit my job without having to talk to someone about it first. Still, it would be nice to have someone to curl up against at night besides my laptop.
My last date was back in October. Since then, the well has been dry. All I want is a man who is caring, independent. Intelligent. Doesn’t live with his mama or baby mama. Has a job and is ready to be in a relationship. So, what’s it going to take?
Is it me? I ask myself this repeatedly. I’m attractive. I go to yoga. I take a belly dancing class on the weekends. I can cook. I’m intelligent. Positive. And knows the difference between a touchdown and a touchback. Maybe I’m too independent. If I go and lay down on the train track, will he come then? Probably not but setting up a booth in the navel yard is looking pretty tempting.
Lately, the song, Ready for Love by India. Aire has greeted me when I wake up in the morning. If I am ready, what’s his hold up? I’ve meet plenty of great guys but there has been no spark. I have been in love. Have had a couple of almost relationships, where, on paper, the guy was everything I wanted but it just wasn’t right.
I’ve also been hurt, abused, raped, and abandoned. But I’ve never been loved. Have never received flowers just because. Yet, I still fantasize that I’ll turn the corner one day and he’ll be there. Until then, I’ll just have to keep writing about him, but I’m starting to get a cramp in my hand.
R.W. Shannon is the author of several reads on IRE, including Business Before Pleasure and The Education of Sophie. Her upcoming release schedule includes : Nocturne – Beautiful Trouble Publishing, Chasing Dawn –Phaze Books, and Silver Moon – Cobblestone Press. Her other titles can be found on Cobblestone Press. Check out R.W. Shannon's Website and Blog
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28 Responses to "R.W.Shannon: Sex and the Single Vamp"
said this on 08 Mar 2011 2:54:50 PM CDT
Lady I gets you! Sorry to say it but focus on you is advice so lame it needs a shot of adrenaline to the chest to jump start that bitch. It also implies that there's something in you that needs improving. It gets harder the older we get to meet guys. Ah the days of university where I would tell a guy to 'wait a minute I need to dance to Justin.' I have realized though my hot man-boy isn't going to rock up to my house when I'm in my knee socks and flannel pjs. I do need to make the effort and leave my chamber once in a while. What about a Time Out magazine and a pin and doing something you never normally would. I nominate... Badminton! New alcohol free places always throw up a hottie or two. Take it from a serial dater!
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said this on 09 Mar 2011 1:23:22 PM CDT
lol, serial dater, eh? :-) I do get out of the house but ,um...What's Time Out magazine?
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said this on 07 Mar 2011 11:49:29 PM CDT
I do hate to be single, and I assure you, I know your fears completely. I will be 36 this year. Still single and childless, I've tried everything, so I'm basically going to leave it alone. I have a crappy work schedule, so I don't get to go out during normal hours and meet people. I'm too shy when it comes to clubs and things. @wingedbeast: you crack me up. :P
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said this on 08 Mar 2011 8:51:38 AM CDT
i feel you. I've tried everything, too. My schedule (i had a two hour commute on top of a ten hrs day, six days a week) was one of the factors that lead me to quit my job. i've never done the club thing because it got on my nerves.
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said this on 07 Mar 2011 8:55:07 PM CDT
Love this blog. I can't even tell you how many times me and my friends have had this conversation. Your right there wrong with wanting someone special in your life. You are not alone. One thing I learned from seeing some other woman in action is no guy want a female who comes off needy and desperate. Some of us can become so obsessed with finding a man that we actually end up running them off. Also I love my girlfriends but even God himself could live up to some of their standards. lol My married friends also give the worst advise or want to set me up with guys I have nothing in common with! lol I haven't really done the online datting thing. It just seem impersonal to me but have seen it work well for others. It's hard I been trying to just be open and stay positve.
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said this on 07 Mar 2011 10:13:24 PM CDT
i agree. i think, at times, i can be too independant. which make them think "why does she need me". When i try to be dependent, i get they "why are you dependant on me". sigh. i've also raised and lowered my standards so much i could probably charge admission. i've thrown up my hands in surrender. but, at this point, if the universe wants me to be alone the rest of my life, i will be happy and alone *fake smile*
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said this on 07 Mar 2011 7:35:08 PM CDT
This is a great post and I love that you are saying what you feel. I not sure where people get the advice that they give but umm, yeah it needs to be taken with a grain of salt...I always wonder what happens after you focus on yourself and get your life in order and nothing happens..........Love the covers of your books....
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said this on 07 Mar 2011 10:17:00 PM CDT
Thanks, Abigail-Masison. most advice, especially dating advice does need to be taken with a grain of salt. if one more married friend tells me to focus on myself one more time, i can't be held accountable for my actions...
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said this on 07 Mar 2011 7:39:18 AM CDT
I Love you R.W. Shannon :-) so many will be able to relate to what you're referring to in this blog. Hope we all find that special one in 2011
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said this on 07 Mar 2011 9:07:25 AM CDT
I'm right there with ya and all the bad advice, too.
I keep on trying internet dating just out of a lack of other ways for a non-drinking non-churchgoer to meet ladies. But, that comes to the point where I'm willing to give somebody's right arm just for a face-to-face meeting. It's to the point where the only advice I can give a woman such as yourself in the same situation as myself is "lower your standards... not a lot, just enough for me to slide in." |
said this on 07 Mar 2011 3:07:42 PM CDT
smooth advice WingedBeast, real smooth :)
@ Janet E. she won't have to worry, the dude would think she is too crazy to save and let the train run over her or he may not want his shoes to get scuffed. either way RW woud be doomed :) |
said this on 07 Mar 2011 10:08:26 PM CDT
and with my luck, that's excatly how it will happen, lol!
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said this on 07 Mar 2011 3:55:37 PM CDT
lol...I've also done the "date someone you normally wouldn't" thing. i also don't drink or go to church often, either so I too am running out of options. and i highly doubt someone would have to lower their standard for you to "slide in".
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said this on 07 Mar 2011 11:00:31 PM CDT
I have been trying to find more social occasions. It's hard to find them. Every time I go to the local museum, for instance, there's just not many people there. And how do you pick up women in a museum anyway? I've tried bookstores.
I can't do anything for you but comisserate and, if I ever find you tied up on train tracks, promise that I'll pull you off. |
said this on 07 Mar 2011 11:52:56 AM CDT
I just had this conversation with Partner in Crime. She has been doing the online thing and I'm still trying to convince her to blog her experiences because...well truth is stranger than fiction. Oh and be careful laying on those train tracks, dude might be so focused taking a picture with his phone he won't save you in time;)
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said this on 07 Mar 2011 3:57:21 PM CDT
lol...it is stranger than fiction. the gallery of pics alone is a hoot.
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said this on 07 Mar 2011 1:31:43 PM CDT
I understand your frustration, in fact I'm glad you posted this blog. So many women are afraid to say they don't want to be single. There's nothing wrong with saying 'I want someone in my life.' It doesn't make you any less independent nor does it make you some swooning Penelope Pitstop.
I too would like to find someone and I'm not afraid to admit that. One of my problems is friends, we don't like the same kinds of men so therefore when we go out we go to places geared towards their taste. *sigh* For the millionth time I need new friends. LOL! |
said this on 07 Mar 2011 4:00:25 PM CDT
i know...it seems so taboo, but, as with anyting, how do you fix it if you don't talk about it.
for me, all of my friend are happily married and they are the one that give the worse advice, lol. |
said this on 07 Mar 2011 1:34:11 PM CDT
By the way I love the picture of the masked woman :)
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said this on 07 Mar 2011 8:06:25 PM CDT
I'm trying to remember whether Tod or Jason took the picture. I'll have to ask them. Both do amazing work! Tod has a corset image I'm saving for a book cover.
Tod is my muse *swoon* |
said this on 10 Mar 2011 2:14:35 PM CDT
RW
I'm so da*n glad to have a woman like you in our family. Fist in the air my sister...fist in the air. Though I am married, that advice is akin to old folk saying 'by and by' and church folk saying 'in God's time'...and you know it's true but it's not helpful when you are the one experiencing the trauma, the loneliness, the pain. Thank you for putting this out there. You rock. |
said this on 10 Mar 2011 2:14:36 PM CDT
RW
I'm so da*n glad to have a woman like you in our family. Fist in the air my sister...fist in the air. Though I am married, that advice is akin to old folk saying 'by and by' and church folk saying 'in God's time'...and you know it's true but it's not helpful when you are the one experiencing the trauma, the loneliness, the pain. Thank you for putting this out there. You rock. |
said this on 11 Mar 2011 4:20:45 PM CDT
Thanks, Jayha. I've also gotten the "in God's time" advice. (smh).
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said this on 11 Mar 2011 12:01:56 PM CDT
Hi, love the conversation. I am from the UK and currently staying in the US. I may be about to be talking a load of crap but i'll take my chances. I don't think there is a right answer just that if you imagine what you want and let the universe knows it will happen. Each relationship prepares you for the one to come. I met my current partner on the net after years of dating and having relationships after relationship. if I am honest he is not who I thought I would end up with because we are so different, but it has worked. R.W you will find the one, believe it will happen ( don't give up hope) and it will. Love will find you when you least expect it
AW |
said this on 12 Mar 2011 1:18:03 PM CDT
Thank you, Annette. I don't think your post is a load of crap at all. I haven't totally given up, but i'm almost at that point. i'm glad you found you special somone.
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said this on 30 Jul 2012 11:28:09 PM CDT
Hello,
I just purchased 6 of your books, 4 of them in the Men of Rhodes series. Can you please give me the order in which to read, Thank you Charlene |