Abigail-Madison Chase: Like Carrie Bradshaw, I’ve been left at the altar
- By Guest Post
- Published February 15, 2011
Like Carrie Bradshaw, I’ve been left at the altar.
While making toast and watching Sex and the City I realized failure is an option. There I said it “it’s ok to fail”. My life is full of challenges. I am a busy working mom with two teen and a hundred things to do. Failure, most days is, not an option. I have too much to do. When the rubber meets the road, I need a car waiting in the wings to keep me on schedule.
Failure is never an option or is it?
It’s strange when and where an epiphany happens. As Big left Carrie at the altar I realized no matter how hard I try to get it right failure is an option. Umpteenth years of breaking up and getting back together and just when Carrie thinks she has it all Big leaves her at the altar. But the most telling moment was when she said “I knew you would do this”.
I know the feeling well. Just when I think I have it all together life knocks me down. Carrie asked the question, will I ever love again? I keep wondering if this time was the last time for Carrie and Big. Would she give Big another chance? Was failure her option this time? Sitting on my couch eating my toast, watching as Carrie maneuvered her way through life after failure, I asked the question: Will I ever get it right and not fail?
Looking at my own life, I wondered: Which Sex and the City star am I most like? Am I like Charlotte willing just to walk away even when I play a part in my own failure? Or was I like Miranda, willing to take it slow and jog even if I am scared.
I am my own Charlotte. I tell myself it’s not going to work so why try. I fall asleep planning for the next day, the next week even the next year. I go over and over in mind what it takes to make things tick. It only matters if I get it right or does it? Can I not get it right and still have it all? Buttering my plain toast as Al Green meandered about a broken heart I realized failure is an option.
So, like Carrie my key word is love. I love the idea of making it work. It’s like a love letter. I write it every day. Carrie asked why did they decide not get married. I asked when did get ruled out as an option.
In the end, there are many options and like Carrie in her $550 dollar shoes and simple wedding, I dust myself off and for the umpteenth time I try and make it work: The marriage between all the things in my life that I don’t want to fail at.
While failure is an option, it’s fun to try and make it work. Yep, it’s funny what you can learn from a piece of toast and watching Sex and the City.
Oh, well maybe one day I’ll find my own assistant to straighten my life out.
Abigail Madison Chase is a 20 something (ok, 40somthing) neurotic mom of two. A highly trained professional (If only in her mind, she’s Jane Bond super heroine) and a budding romance writer working towards publication in 2011.
Abigail-Madison Chase attended a Wiley College in Marshall Texas majoring in English and History. Abigail is currently pursuing a PhD so that before she kicks the bucket she can teach English. Three fragmented sentences to describe Abigail are: boring, more boring and most boring of all.
Check out Abigail's Blog: Always Abigail
While making toast and watching Sex and the City I realized failure is an option. There I said it “it’s ok to fail”. My life is full of challenges. I am a busy working mom with two teen and a hundred things to do. Failure, most days is, not an option. I have too much to do. When the rubber meets the road, I need a car waiting in the wings to keep me on schedule.
Failure is never an option or is it?
It’s strange when and where an epiphany happens. As Big left Carrie at the altar I realized no matter how hard I try to get it right failure is an option. Umpteenth years of breaking up and getting back together and just when Carrie thinks she has it all Big leaves her at the altar. But the most telling moment was when she said “I knew you would do this”.
I know the feeling well. Just when I think I have it all together life knocks me down. Carrie asked the question, will I ever love again? I keep wondering if this time was the last time for Carrie and Big. Would she give Big another chance? Was failure her option this time? Sitting on my couch eating my toast, watching as Carrie maneuvered her way through life after failure, I asked the question: Will I ever get it right and not fail?
Looking at my own life, I wondered: Which Sex and the City star am I most like? Am I like Charlotte willing just to walk away even when I play a part in my own failure? Or was I like Miranda, willing to take it slow and jog even if I am scared.
I am my own Charlotte. I tell myself it’s not going to work so why try. I fall asleep planning for the next day, the next week even the next year. I go over and over in mind what it takes to make things tick. It only matters if I get it right or does it? Can I not get it right and still have it all? Buttering my plain toast as Al Green meandered about a broken heart I realized failure is an option.
So, like Carrie my key word is love. I love the idea of making it work. It’s like a love letter. I write it every day. Carrie asked why did they decide not get married. I asked when did get ruled out as an option.
In the end, there are many options and like Carrie in her $550 dollar shoes and simple wedding, I dust myself off and for the umpteenth time I try and make it work: The marriage between all the things in my life that I don’t want to fail at.
While failure is an option, it’s fun to try and make it work. Yep, it’s funny what you can learn from a piece of toast and watching Sex and the City.
Oh, well maybe one day I’ll find my own assistant to straighten my life out.
Abigail Madison Chase is a 20 something (ok, 40somthing) neurotic mom of two. A highly trained professional (If only in her mind, she’s Jane Bond super heroine) and a budding romance writer working towards publication in 2011.
Abigail-Madison Chase attended a Wiley College in Marshall Texas majoring in English and History. Abigail is currently pursuing a PhD so that before she kicks the bucket she can teach English. Three fragmented sentences to describe Abigail are: boring, more boring and most boring of all.
Check out Abigail's Blog: Always Abigail
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8 Responses to "Abigail-Madison Chase: Like Carrie Bradshaw, I’ve been left at the altar"
said this on 15 Feb 2011 1:18:06 PM CST
Thanks so much for having me Tracy....
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said this on 15 Feb 2011 2:01:20 PM CST
Anytime! You're family now...don't run. :)
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said this on 15 Feb 2011 1:37:28 PM CST
Failure - I view it as a valuable lesson. All mistakes or missed chances are. Love - be in love with yourself first. Men - strange beings yet doable.
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said this on 15 Feb 2011 2:15:57 PM CST
Bang on, Amarinda! Women have a tiny need to be everything...and normally we run ourselves crazy trying to make it happen. It's a tough habit to break.
"Men: Strange beings yet doable" LOL! I love it! |
said this on 15 Feb 2011 2:02:48 PM CST
Ok this may sound like sacrilege, I (hand over heart) have never watched an episode of SITC (?) in its entirety but everyone can relate to failure. For me fear and failure are best friends, traveling together or not too far behind each other. Maybe I am a skeptic but for me failure is always an option, on the coin of life failure is on one side and the other is success, we just have to thrive to ensure we succeed rather than fail, and if we do fail learn from it and make that failure into a positive accomplishment
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said this on 15 Feb 2011 6:35:52 PM CST
Failure is like rejection. My new years resolution this year was to become a coinaseur of both. For instance, I probably failed to spell coinaseur correctly. Give it a serious shot, collect the "no" or the "fail".
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said this on 15 Feb 2011 6:59:03 PM CST
Abigail,
Welcome! Failure is a big one for me. The idea of it used to make me sick. The other one was the idea of letting people down. To say I don't care anymore would be too flippant, but I don't rest my decisions in the pursuit of avoiding those feelings or occurrances. Getting older is a beautiful thing. Thanks for bringing this piece to us. |
said this on 15 Feb 2011 8:01:06 PM CST
@Amarinda, there is most certailnly a lesson to be learned from failure sometimes the harder the failure the more you learn I agree men are doable (LOL)@Tracy that is so true the need to do it all and get it all right is a tough habit to break @Judy, I think we are conditioned to believe that failure is not an option and its hard to get to the point where you can fail and be comfortable and yes definately looking at the positive side of what we have learned when we fail should always happen@WingBeast great observation and good luck on your resolution. I am learning to live with failure and its not always easy but it's possible to get up and trying again.@Olga, I agree wisdom comes with age and the wise person learns that failure at letting people down is not failure but not killing yourself trying to please others. Thanks for all your comments
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